Shmini Atzeret

by By Etan Newman, Emtza Region Rel/Ed VP 2002-2003, 5763

For the first nine years of my life, I had a very close relationship with my grandmother, my dad's mother. She lived near me, and would often take care of me when I stayed home sick from school. We loved to play games, talk, and watch jeopardy together. On April 5, 1995, I got the news during the school day that she had passed away. Although I was relatively young, I knew what this meant, and was very saddened by it. But my brother and I had extensively planned a surprise birthday scavenger hunt for my mom, to take place that afternoon after school. When we came home, we told her that we had planned it, and she was not quite sure if she still wanted to do it, but she left the decision up to me. I thought about it for a while, and decided that we should still give her the birthday celebration that we had planned. "Even on a day of sadness, there can be joy," I told my family.

That was a long time ago, but I still believe in the words that I spoke that day. As Jews, we celebrate often, from holidays to weddings, from brit to bar mitzvah. But we also commemorate solemnly, and grieve as a community. We set aside Tisha B'Av and other fast days to remember the temple and its destruction. We observe Yom Hashoah and Yom Hazikaron to remember people, some of them our relatives and friends, who died at the hands of the Nazis, or defending our homeland. And we grieve with members of our community, sitting shiva when someone dies and reciting kaddish in the synagogue.

Taking all these examples, though, may seem to tell us that we must separate between sadness and joy, between celebration and solemn commemoration. This is where Shmini Atzeret comes in.

Shmini Atzeret, the eighth day of Sukkot, while still a separate holiday, seems to have little purpose when compared with the other holidays of the Jewish calendar. We know that Rosh Hashanah celebrates the new year, Sukkot celebrates the harvest, and Simchat Torah celebrates the ending and beginning again of the reading of the Torah. But what is the purpose of Shmini Atzeret?

"Shmini Atzeret," means, literally, "8th day solemn festival." The Torah tells us, "atzeret t'hiyu lachem," "you shall hold a solemn gathering." (Bemidbar 29:25) In this spirit, we say Yizkor on Shmini Atzeret, the service done four times a year to remember and pay respect to those whom we love who passed away. But at the same time, the Rabbis call Shmini Atzeret, "z'man simchateinu," "the time of our joy." In this spirit, we call Shmini Atzeret a festival, and say shechechianu and other prayers thanking God for bringing us to this day.

It is this very tension between the solemn and the joyous which is the purpose of Shmini Atzeret. This day in the Jewish calendar serves to teach us the importance of the balance between sadness and happiness, and, indeed, that they can, and must, coexist. It is important for us to have days of pure joy, and a community with which where we can express pure sorrow. But we must always remember that the two are not mutually exclusive, and in our communities they can and must happen side by side. Because when I am celebrating my brother's bar mitzvah, someone else sitting in the congregation is saying kaddish. And when I am mourning, someone else who comes to shiva may just have gotten engaged. Sorrow and joy must be observed together.

And so as I look back on that April day, over seven years ago, I can see that we made the right choice. I knew back then that my grandmother would have wanted us to celebrate even though at the same time we were grieving for her. Sorrow and joy, solemnity and celebration must go side by side. This Shmini Atzeret, lets remember to balance our emotions of happiness and sadness together. Because on a day of sadness, there must also be joy. Shana Tova v'Chag Sameach.